Husbands

[Austeria]

I was reading on another forum where a lady's husband was cleaning her monitor and messed it up. She was looking for help fixing the monitor, but all I could think of was how she got her husband to clean. Does your husband help around the house?

[Wendy]

Mine doesn't. I don't expect him too as I am a stay at home mom. He works at his job all day & it is my job to clean, cook, etc.

[Austeria]

Mine isn't expected to help, either. My kids do a lot of it. I have a chore jar and they pick from it each morning, doing whatever chore they pick. When all the chores are done, the cards go back into the jar for the next day. I do all the laundry and cooking.

[vicki in NW OH]

He'll help if it's a cleaning job where I would have to kneel. I cannot kneel on my left knee; otherwise no.

[caballoviejo]

I really miss not helping out with cleaning.

So I'm hiring a lady to come twice a week to kneel around on creaky knees while I bark orders from the sofa!

Ahhhh, old times here are not forgotten.

Guess I'm gonna feel nasty today

[BJ]

No help here. But he screws up the computer a lot. Wait, he unloads the groceries from the bags and all over the counter so I have to put them back into the bags to carry down the basement to the storeroom.

[Alegria]

Mine doesn't help much, but then the kids & I try to stay on top of it so he doesn't have to. He does do the heavier outside stuff, like splitting wood, tilling the garden, etc. He also took me shopping Saturday so I wouldn't have to drive.

[joan from zone 6]

I really miss not helping out with cleaning.

So I'm hiring a lady to come twice a week to kneel around on creaky knees while I bark orders from the sofa!

Ahhhh, old times here are not forgotten.

Guess I'm gonna feel nasty today

gonna cost extra if you insist on using the sharp stick -

[andrew]

I helped all my wives....but it didn't save our marriages. The next time I am going to do things different.

[Terran]

I helped all my wives....but it didn't save our marriages. The next time I am going to do things different.

Andrew, I'm sorry you had that experience. My husband always helped, laundry, changing diapers, dishes, etc. We both worked and kept up with household chores together. I appreciated the fact that he was always ready to lend a hand. I guess that has set the tone for me, don't think I could ever be with someone who didn't help around the house. In fact, he was a far better cook than I.

[7castles7hills]

I wouldn't say he helps...we both work at it, as do the children. There's always plenty to do, and we both work outside the home.

For the most part, we compliment each other with the things we do regularly. Where one skims the other digs in and vice versa.

All of the children learn to do everything around the place including cooking, cleaning, laundry, repairs, auto diagnosing and repairs (within reason, we don't expect everyone to be a mechanic, but to have a clue is important to not get ripped off at the shop), budget and work with bills/money management, animal care and grooming, etc. A full skill set for life because everyone has 'stuff' to handle in life, and not everyone gets someone to share the load for a lifetime. Even those who marry sometimes end up alone again whether by death or divorce.

Besides, when he was in the military they trained him meticulously to launder and iron, so why let all that expensive training go to waste??? [he finds it relaxing. I don't nag him into it - and I find other tasks relaxing so I do those]

[doglot]

I helped all my wives....but it didn't save our marriages. The next time I am going to do things different.

How many?

Many women appreciate rascals they can "fix" and stay.

[caballoviejo]

I helped all my wives....but it didn't save our marriages. The next time I am going to do things different.

How many?

Many women appreciate rascals they can "fix" and stay.

Is that "fix" like when you say "we got the dog fixed? Emasculation?

[lifesaholiday]

You women ruin men when you marry them.

I am not married but, I get up first and turn on the coffee and turn up the heat. Then I feed the cats and dogs. Then I make her breakfast (what she wants). Then I fix her lunch (again, what she wants). Then I wash dishes while she is getting ready for work. About 5 to 10 minutes before she leaves I start her truck to warm it up and melt any ice. I then walk about a 100 yards to open the gate.

After she leaves, I make up the bed, gather garbage, and do some light cleaning. Then I feed her chickens, donkeys and horses.

Then I drive 48 miles to take care of my place and business. I return about 4 or 5 pm to fix supper (again, what she wants).

[Austeria]

Dan did most of that before I agreed to marry him.

[lifesaholiday]

Silly girl.

[Austeria]

You're telling me!

[Topaz Farm]

Mine cleans. He always has.

Since he has retired, for the second time, he has feed the horses every morning. And some mornings it has been cold and snowy.

[7castles7hills]

You women ruin men when you marry them.

I am not married but, I get up first and turn on the coffee and turn up the heat. Then I feed the cats and dogs. Then I make her breakfast (what she wants). Then I fix her lunch (again, what she wants). Then I wash dishes while she is getting ready for work. About 5 to 10 minutes before she leaves I start her truck to warm it up and melt any ice. I then walk about a 100 yards to open the gate.

After she leaves, I make up the bed, gather garbage, and do some light cleaning. Then I feed her chickens, donkeys and horses.

Then I drive 48 miles to take care of my place and business. I return about 4 or 5 pm to fix supper (again, what she wants).

So, are you saying our husbands are ruined in some fashion?

Or that you are?

I don't know you well enough to grasp your implication here.

My husband and I were taught marriage is a sacrificial loving relationship, even when you don't feel very loving sometimes. He rubs my neck when I am having a migraine, I rub his feet and legs and lower back when he's aching from a long day on his feet in work boots. Neither of us dictates who does what. We worked with our strengths and needs, and spent some time teaching each other so when the time comes, if one of us is left alone, there won't be such a big hole to muddle through. Things like going over the finances together, and insurance policies, where to find things, who to call for things, how to do some things.

It's teamwork, not servitude.

You sound like a very caring person, generous, to go to such lengths each day. I hope some of the things you do are things you can enjoy.

[Unk]

My first wifes husband isn't much help around the house. He is a big help outdoors as long as he don't have to squat. I do do a fair amount of cleaning up in the house now that I think about it. I clean up most of the leftovers in the fridge. I cleaned up an apple pie last night. I broke my wife in to hard stuff when she was 17. After 56 years, she has pretty much got the hang of it.
AWW Lighten up <>Unk